


Memento

by Illusioneery (Arkee)



Series: Memento [1]
Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Amnesia, Angst, M/M, Redemption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2019-01-17 15:05:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12368307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arkee/pseuds/Illusioneery
Summary: In which Cloud brings home a Sephiroth who's unable to retain memories for long.





	Memento

**Author's Note:**

> It has implications of CC era Seph/Cloud here and there.

**I.**

The first gift he receives when he comes back from the Lifestream is a journal.

The stranger who gives it to him — with blond hair defying gravity much like the bird he rode to that place, so far away from everything — claims his name to be Sephiroth. He just accepts it, unable to recall even that much about himself. Sephiroth it has to be as it feels right, and yet, he can’t help but wonder what happened for him to find himself in such a state; why that beautiful stranger fails to fight away tears upon realizing the full extension of his predicament.

He can’t help but think too much about it in such a short time when the stranger finally offers his own name.

 _Cloud_.

Just like the ones in the sky, Cloud. Sephiroth figures it fits the shorter man, but at the same time he’s filled by endless questions about it, such as “ _Who would name their son that?_ ” or “Is _this a common name for people?_ ” that stick with him even if he doesn’t ask them.

He wonders who this man was to him as he’s led away from that pale, bright forest by a firm hand holding his.

**II.**

When he wakes up after the first night, Sephiroth is unable to recall who that blond man is, even if he retains the knowledge of his own name. The stranger takes a moment to understand Sephiroth means it when he says he doesn’t know him.

A little hint of pain in that expression and the need for another introduction are the things that prompt the need for the journal.

 _Cloud_ , like the ones passing by in the bright blue sky above, Sephiroth notes down, along with the rest of his day. It feels familiar, — almost too close to the heart for whatever reason he’s unable to remember — and he supposes it should be like so, given what the blond so patiently told him. Over his shoulder, the shorter man braiding his hair starts to giggle.

“Oh no, you drew me,” he says, unable to keep the comment to himself about the little doodle on the corner of the page, “And you made me cute. I’m not that cute, Seph.”

“You think too lowly of yourself, then. You are rather adorable.”

Cloud stops braiding his hair, stops giggling even. It makes Sephiroth turn his head to look at him in his concern. Was that something wrong to say? Should he have just agreed and laughed along? What—

The blond had started crying.

Sephiroth does the sensible thing and tries to offer comfort by pulling the smaller form into his arms, running a hand just gently through bright colored spikes of hair in a motion that feels just vaguely familiar. It only makes Cloud cry more instead of soothing him, somehow; trembling and sobbing as though his world had ended. Maybe, it just did. The apologies the amnesiac man offers come out without thought or the knowledge of what he’s apologizing for, exactly.

**III.**

Sephiroth reads the journal to remember who Cloud was — again — even before the blond is up for breakfast. Not that he even retained the name after being told so, but the clear skies outside his window in the morning have the word stuck on his head, along with both a strange sadness and the feeling he should be remembering something about that. _Cloud_. Cloud who apparently looks more like a chocobo than a cloud, even if the name oddly fits; the man who brought him to the house they are now sharing even if no mental image for that event pops into Sephiroth’s head as he thinks of it.

He feels somewhat bothered by the fact that this is his life now, apparently; having to relearn about even the smallest things he did and the people he met and interacted with through reading things he doesn’t even recall writing, every day. Or rather, he feels frustrated in his inability of recalling the events of the previous day and the past.

Before leaving the room for breakfast, he writes down a note about it just so he can “remember” later.

Once in the kitchen, he’s draw immediately to the fire that allows Cloud to make pancakes, in a way that he interprets as a need of remembering something but failing to recall anything. The blond catches him staring far too intently and gets unusually anxious about it, directing him to just sit down as the breakfast will be ready soon.

Sephiroth considers taking note of that.

**IV.**

A woman he doesn’t recall ( _obviously_ ) comes by. Cloud tells him, before even letting her in, to stay upstairs.

Maybe it’s the wiser choice, given the argument that follows; one that has his curiosity taking the better of him and having him stay just near the stairs to hear it.

The woman, clearly angered, makes an observation of the fact she’s _perfectly aware he’s there, Cloud, stop playing innocent with me_. Sephiroth feels as if he’s heard that voice before, somewhere... before all of this, but as always fails to find any memories related to it in his mind.

Cloud lets out a tired sigh as that discussion starts going _places_. _Insistent places._

“Ok, so what if he’s here?”

“Then I’ll kill him myself and punch some sense into you!” It’s a shout. Her patience was probably thin already and seems to be running short now. “It’s like you don’t know who he is anymore, Cloud. You don’t remember what he did? Our town... Aerith...”

 _Aerith_. That sounds familiar, too.

“Tifa. He doesn’t even remember who he is, himself. Much less what he did then.” He sounds angered as well, albeit in a quieter manner.

“And that’s enough reason to bring him into your house, then,” she says, sarcastically, “What if he remembers and tries to kill you in your sleep, huh? What am _I_ supposed to do?!”

What Sephiroth is unable to see from his current position is that Cloud takes a step backwards with that, quite unsure about the possibilities; recklessly delivering an “It... it won’t come to that” despite the fact he clearly doesn’t know whether it could happen or not and that it has him a little shaken. “Listen, I’m not gonna sit down and allow _that_ kind of thing to happen again, alright? And right now... this is working better than just... _y’know...” Well, if working better is having Sephiroth as the blank slate he currently is, anyway_. “Which I’m tired of having to do, by the way — I don’t really care about what you end up doing if anything happens. Just... let me have this. For now.”

The woman — Tifa — seems to give up then, as she says something to the blond Sephiroth can’t quite catch even with his hearing being surprisingly good and there’s this sound of a door opening then closing; a heavy sigh lingering in the air.

It takes a little while, but eventually, Cloud joins him in his bedroom, taking a good look at him before approaching even more for a hug and staying like that. He provides no explanation about their visitor and is clearly upset, sobbing quietly after a moment or two.

Sephiroth makes sure he’s taken note of all of that before going to bed that night.

**V.**

“What am I to you?” He finally asks, intrigued by his own notes.

It makes Cloud snap to attention too abruptly.

“Many things,” the blond says, “Some of which I shouldn’t tell you. Not right now, at least.”

Sephiroth asks about the things the other can surely tell him. He’s not ready to be told they’ve been lovers a long time ago and at the same time, puzzled at the reasons why he hasn’t been told about that before, as he has nothing written about it on his journal.

And Cloud, with an expression that makes him look so many years younger than he should be, simply informs him he didn’t want Sephiroth to feel obligated to do something about that, especially... with the memory issues already being something for him to deal with. He also looks somewhat upset about that, which the amnesiac man isn’t sure if it’s about the topic or about the reason that caused them to just... cease to be together as a couple.

He’s only sure that his reaction to that — gently approaching and kissing the blond — feels natural to a point he wonders why he hadn’t thought about doing that before.

“You shouldn’t have to—“

“I want to try,” Sephiroth interrupts the blond, “It might... hn, be an extra thing I’ll need an explanation about in the morning, but I really want... to try this.”

Cloud reaches out to gently push a strand of silver hair out of the other man’s face before looking away, appearing to be somewhat troubled.

“Aren’t you doing this out of pity? Because of what I told you?”

“No,” Sephiroth says as he takes the blond’s chin and forces Cloud to look at him again, “Doing such a thing... it wouldn’t be fair.”

It certainly makes Cloud think of something that might be unrelated, and which steals a chuckle out of him and an apology for it. Also a kiss; the blond’s way of “telling” him he agrees with trying to, well, be together again.

**VI.**

Sephiroth makes love to a man he can’t quite say he knows aside from what the notes he reads and what he’s told by said man — Who’s too busy at the moment writhing under him in bed; letting out sounds that seem to be so familiar and yet don’t awake any memories. Regardless of that, Cloud — that’s the man’s name —is definitely an adorable little thing while losing himself to the pleasure like that.

( _Cloud, just like the ones in the sky_. One that keeps being blown away from his memory, just like everything else about his life. One that he apparently has a relationship with.)

After it comes to an end; after Sephiroth is able to bask in the sweet expression the blond has on his face during orgasm while getting _there,_ himself, he needs to be comforted in face of his realization. A shaky hand of his panting lover reaches out to brush tears away from his eyes and cheeks before Cloud simply pulls him down into a hug.

“I... I don’t... I don’t want to... forget you tomorrow...”

If anything, the arms around him tighten a little.

“I know... I’m sorry...”

That night, Cloud tries his best to soothe him into sleeping but even so it’s difficult when they both know what will happen in the morning.

**VII.**

The questioning in the morning — “ _Who are you? What’s this place?”_ — is what hurts most, Cloud thinks.

Regardless of that, he walks Sephiroth through their “morning routine” (as he comes to call it with time) of at least making sure the other man’s aware of the basics; that they are living together in that house, that Cloud has a delivery service — even though he’s been staying at home more than usual at the moment — and that they’re in a relationship.

(To which Sephiroth replies he’s glad that’s the case, because the blond seems to be a good person. _A good person who’s attractive, too,_ in his own words. Cloud, on his end, is grateful the other man doesn’t use “adorable” or any variation of the word to describe him, as it reminds him a little too much of the Sephiroth he’s lost a long time ago on the day Nibelheim burned.)

It’s not quite the same as what they had before all the chaos happened — on the contrary, it’s much different from that — but at the very least it’s... something.

And as the notes begin to grow with each passing day, Cloud knows his task of informing the man of such things will become mandatory. After all, it’ll obviously come to a point in which reading all of the journal will become an impossible task for Sephiroth to do in a single day. Not that he minds, as long as this whole situation eventually brings them some sort of happiness; as long as Sephiroth remains a good man instead of the madman who burned his town to the ground and killed his friend.

He’s pulled out of his thoughts with a sudden kiss.

“You’re over thinking,” Sephiroth notes.

“Uh...? Yeah... sorry. I kinda remembered something.”

“It’s okay,” he says with a smile that reminds Cloud of those moments in which people make an allusion to his name in relation to his over thinking about something or another. _Cloud getting lost in the clouds_ , as they say. But Sephiroth... he doesn’t make that allusion. At least not today. “Now where were we?””

“Breakfast?” Cloud offers.

The reply comes as a nod and another kiss.

In the end, Cloud finds it somewhat ironic that somehow he became the memory of someone he told to stay in his memories.

**∞.**

It happens in the middle of a delivery. One that had him bringing Sephiroth along with him — half because he couldn’t trust the man to be on his own for more than a day considering his memory issues and half because he wanted to keep Sephiroth close to him as he finally has him around in some positive capacity.

Cloud wakes up first, but allows the other man to sleep a while more, playing with a wild silver strand of hair to distract himself in the meanwhile.

Eventually, green eyes lazily open to greet him, along with a very sleepy “Good morning... Cloud.”

It definitely catches him off guard.

“What?”

“You remembered my name,” Cloud says with the fondest of the smiles on his face.

“But just the name.” It’s a sad note to make.

“It’s a start.”

And as Cloud fills in all the other usual blanks, he thinks about the day he won’t have to do so anymore, finding himself longing for it despite how unsure about what will happen when it finally comes he feels.


End file.
